Posts belonging to Category Truck Driver Jokes

Surprise Found in my Sleeper

This happened in 2006 at the flying J in Winslow, Arizona.  I was doing a team run from phoenix to Columbus, Ohio.  I was sleeping when rob stopped to get some coffee.  He parked on the fuel island, and ran in to get a cup.  I was sleeping off a three day weekend of chasing wild women in phoenix.  We were rolling maybe 1 hour when i felt something rub my leg.  So i turned on the bunk light only to see a drunken Indian on the floor.  I was shocked i did not know what to say.  I opened the curtain, and asked rob hey do you know this guy?  “He did a double take”,  and screamed hey what the ****, who the hell are you.  Rob pulled over on the shoulder, and we woke him up,  and asked him what the hell!!   He said he was  drunk so he climbed in the sleeper to sleep.  Rob left the door unlocked something i told him to never do!  We made the Indian get out right there 1 hour away from his home.  That was one of the weirdest thing’s to ever happen to me on the road. Share your stories like this with me if you have any.  GONZOTRUCKER

1,657 total views, 6 views today

Incoming search terms:

• Powered by Article Dashboard net curtain panels (4)
• map of uk (2)
• indian field gonzo (1)
• left lane cow truck (1)
• Powered by Article Dashboard injury attorneys long island (1)

HIJACKED

This happened to me two years ago.  I was going west on I-10 mile marker 80, near Tonopah, Arizona.   When I heard on the CB radio that a four wheeler was going the wrong way on the shoulder.  He was going west on the eastbound side,  then he crossed over onto the westbound side.  He passed me then cut in front of me,  and started to slow down.  So I changed lanes, and he did to every time slowing down until we came to a stop.  Then he jumped out of the car,  and onto my running board.  He was now trying to open my door,  so I put it in 6th gear,  and started to drive  around his car.  He was still hanging on at 45 mph,  the other truckers were telling me on the CB radio,  gonzotrucker you’re going to run him over!   At this point I did not care if I ran him over,  I was afraid for my life.  Who know’s  what he wanted?  I reached 55mph when he fell off, and bounced off the road.  He jumped up ran across the Interstate,  and jumped in the back of a pickup that was stopped on the shoulder. The pickup driver took off down the shoulder,  and called the police.  When they arrived,  and arrested him they found out he was on meth.  He thought people were chasing him!  Well that was my adventure that year Ho Ho!!   GONZOTRUCKER

249 total views, no views today

Incoming search terms:

• trucker jokes (98)
• truck dispatcher jokes (25)
• cdl jokes (4)

These are some of the CB Radio codes we use to communicate with each other. Note many of these we dont use anymore. Mostly just 10-4 and 10-20 the CB Radio can be fun or annoying sometimes. I love it other drivers not so much. It just depends on each trucker. It can be useful also like if there is bad weather or an accident ahead. I also use it for directions when im lost. The most common channel is 19 but sometimes we use diffrent channels.

CB Radio slang most commonly used…

Ears on… Means CB Radio on?

Alligator…. Tire treads on the road

Bear- cop…..   Bear in the air police helicopter

Full grown bear- state police……

CB Rambo… Someone talking shit on the CB but won’t do it to your face!

Lot Lizard… Truck Stop Prostitute

County mounty… County cop

Bear in a plain wrapper… No markings on the car

A bear using radar gun is called… A picture taker

A bear with someone pulled over.   A bear with a customer

Diesel bear… DOT Enforcment cop for big trucks

Disco lights… A bear with his lights on, also bubble gum machine

Feed the bear…. Pay a ticket/fine

Mama Bear.. Female cop/  Papa Bear… Officer in charge

Meat Wagon… Ambulance

Super trucker… A truck with no speed governor hauling ass or aggressive driving

(Good Buddy) It was used to mean friend but some Trucker in Ocala, Florida changed it now mean homosexual. So dont use it unless you wish to insult the other truck driver. Replaced by the term Good neighbor now.

 CB Radio Slang for  Truck’s and Company’s

Baboon Butt….. Kenworth trucks because of the way the front grill looks

Brake Check…. Up ahead traffic is slow.

Freight shaker… Freightliner

Bull Rack.. Livestock hauler.. Turd Hauler..

Car Hauler… Parking Lot

Wagon… Trailer… Covered wagon

Chicken truck… Poultry Hauler also chicken choker

CFI/ Company truck… Corn Flake

Este truck lines… Big E

Four Wheller… A car or pickup truck

Pumpkin truck…. Schneider National

Salt Shaker… Snow plows

Skate Board… Flatbed Trailer

Suicide Jockey…. Haz Mat Hauler Explosives

Weiner Wagon… Werner trucking

Back Door/Front Door…. When you’re behind or in front of another truck, the rocking chair is in the middle

Chicken Coop…. Weigh Stations/ Port of Entry

Whats that chicken coop up ahead doing? She is closed or open for business

High Speed Chicken Feed… Drugs used to keep you awake

Joke Book/Comic Book/Cheat Sheet…. Log Books

Pickle Park…  Rest Area

Schneider Eggs…. Orange Construction Barrels

Truck Stop Tommy…. A pimp

Zipper… Painted lines on the road

Im sure i missed a lot of them if so just add them in the comment section below this post. These are just the most common ones i use daily. Some of these are only known by us old school truckers. Also in diffrent countries they use diffrent ones so share them with us.

http://gonzotrucker.com/how-to-be-a-truck-driver/free-state-cdl-manuals/

• 10-1 Receiving Poorly
• 10-2 Receiving Well
• 10-3 Stop Transmitting
• 10-4 Ok, Message Received
• 10-5 Relay Message
• 10-6 Busy, Stand By
• 10-7 Out of Service, Leaving Air
• 10-8 In Service, subject to call
• 10-9 Repeat Message
• 10-10 Transmission Completed, Standing By
• 10-11 Talking too Rapidly
• 10-12 Visitors Present shhhh
• 10-13 Advise weather/road conditions
• 10-16 Make Pickup
• 10-17 Urgent Business
• 10-18 Anything for us yet?
• 10-19 Nothing for you, return to base now
• 10-20 My Location is - or What’s your Location?
• 10-21 Call me by Telephone
• 10-22 Report in Person too
• 10-23 Stand by
• 10-24 Completed last assignment
• 10-25 Can you Contact
• 10-26 Disregard Last Information/Cancel Last Message/Ignore
• 10-27 I am moving to Channel, used when you want talk alone not on channel 20
• 10-28 Identify your station
• 10-29 Time is up for contact
• 10-30 Does not conform to FCC Rules
• 10-32 I will give you a radio check
• 10-33 Emergency Traffic at this station
• 10-34 Trouble at this station, help needed
• 10-35 Confidential Information
• 10-36 Correct Time is, check your clock
• 10-38 Ambulance needed at swift yard
• 10-39 Your message delivered
• 10-41 Please tune to channel
• 10-42 Traffic Accident at
• 10-43 Traffic tie-up at
• 10-44 I have a message for you
• 10-45 All units within range please report
• 10-50 Break Channel
• 10-62 Unable to copy, use phone
• 10-62sb lower unable to copy on AM, use Sideband – Lower (not an official code)
• 10-62su upper unable to copy on AM, use Sideband – Upper (not an official code)
• 10-65 Awaiting your next message/assignment
• 10-67 All units comply
• 10-70 Fire at Truck Stop
• 10-73 Speed Trap at
• 10-75 You are causing interference
• 10-77 Negative Contact
• 10-84 My telephone number is 480 882
• 10-85 My address is
• 10-91 Talk closer to the Mike
• 10-92 Your transmitter is out of adjustment
• 10-93 Check my frequency on this channel
• 10-94 Please give me a long count
• 10-95 Transmit dead carrier for 5 sec.
• 10-99 Mission completed, all units secure
• 10-100 Need to go to Bathroom now got some TP
• 10-200 Police needed at

526 total views, 2 views today

Incoming search terms:

• trucker codes (16)
• trucker radio codes (10)
• truck driver radio codes (5)
• trucker 10 codes (3)
• lot lizard cb channel (3)

“How to deal with dispatchers to get better loads”

Knowing a little about
“dispatchers” is crucial to getting better loads!  First you
should know they earn on average $31,000 a year.  They hold the “key”
to you earning big bucks and your future. They are the biggest factor
for you to earn big money.  They are even more important then your
type of truck or freight you haul.”  Most of them don’t really
care about you earning more money.  Throughout your career you will
have to deal with them.

So how can you get them to work better for
you?   Well it’s simple get to know them on a personnel level.
“Make a 2 minute call each day to them”, just checking in today,
ask hows the family are things going good in the office.  Little
things like that will get you on his or her good side and get “your
name” known to them.   Many dispatchers have 30 or more drivers on
there board so you need to distinguish your self from the pack,  and
1 phone call every day can do that.  Those truck drivers who are not
getting the miles and home time they want,  will tell you there
dispatcher is an *******.   that’s  not always the case maybe there
just not working with the dispatcher in a polite way that creates a
better working environment for both of you.

You will deal with your
dispatcher every day he knows you better then anyone in the company.
He or she knows how good of a truck driver you are.  How many miles
you can run if you cheat your log books,   how much home time you
like, and most importantly how reliable and flexible you are.
Become a valuable asset to them when it comes to taking loads nobody
wants or can do.  “If you have a can do attitude that goes a long
way with dispatchers.”  It’s not always up to them what loads they
have to give you and if you refuse one of these bad loads they wont
forget!  Load planners have most of the control over you and not the
dispatchers.  But if you have a good dispatcher,  and you both get
along he will beg and plead with the load planner on your behalf.
Load planners don’t care because its not there problem they just
need to get the freight moved.  So sometimes your dispatcher has no
say in your loads remember that when you feel like yelling and
screaming at them.  Work well with your dispatcher and they will work
harder for you and your future earnings.
GONZOTRUCKER

The Truth A Veterans Story
My Ebook Highest Salary Trucking Jobs Free To All Veterans
Protect Your CDL

380 total views, 2 views today

Incoming search terms:

• dispatcher jokes (37)
• truck driver dispatcher jokes (6)
• how much do truck dispatchers make deals (2)
• truck dispatcher things to remember (2)
• truck dispatch jokes (2)

NFL and Truck Stops

I rember watching the 1985 chicargo bears beat the New England Patriots with my dad, as a kid.  That’s my earlist memeory of the NFL ever sisnse i’ve watched every Superbowl. One year my neibors cow out, and wandered onto our farm during the superbowl. When the old farmer came to get it he was bitching because he was missing the game due to this cow, the next day he slughtered the cow!!!

Every year i Drove a truck over the road i whould stop, and watch the super bowl no matter what the load, and my dispatchers knew in advance.  My first super bowl out on the road was jan. 25th 1998 the Denver Broncos beat the green bay packers 31-24.  I was in Atlanta at the Travel center’ of america Truck Stop watching the game with other truckers in the truckers tv room.  The following year was Denver Broncos beat the atlanta falcons 34-19 i was at the fling j truck stop in el paso texas.

I have so many memories of watching the NFL, even playoff games at truck stops all across this nation. remeber the superbowl with the st. lous rams vs tenneseee titans?  Wher the titans lost by just one yard on the final play wow what a game that was. I watched that at a rest area on the tv in my sleeper in new york state.  After the game me, and other truckers were on the cb talking all about how it was the greatest superbowl of all time.  The following year i was at a small truck stop in mt. pleasent Iowa when the town lost power. Only place in town with a backup generator was the truck stop. So 90% of the town’s men came to watch the Baltimore Ravens beat the New York giant’s with a bunch of truckers.

Any given sunday at truck stops all across this nation, and the world you will find truck driver’s watching sporting events. I’ve spent a lot of time at truck stops watching NFL football with truck drivers i whould never meet again.  Febuary 3, 2002 the New England Patriots beat the St. Louis rams i was watching at the Travel center’s of America truck stop in Gary indiana, a truck stop i whould never go into except to watch the superbowl!!!   January 26, 2003 the tampa bay buccaneers beat the oakland raider 48-21,  i was at a pilot in some small town in Kentucky. They had no tv so a truck driver got the one out of his sleeper, and broung it inside so we can all watch together.  NFl, and the superbowl will draw men together like fly’s every truck driver to enter the pilot stoped to watch that game with us.

Febuary 1, 2004 New England Patriots vs Carolina Panthers 32-29 New England.  I was parked at South of the border truck stop dillion, south carolina. One truck driver set up a BBQ grill, and tv. We all watched the game in front of his truck, and had some great BBQ . That was a great memory of watching the super bowl on the road. These are some of my memories, What are yours please share with us in the comment section under this post. Have a great day, and i hope where ever you are they have a tv so you ca watch the game. Right now im at home watching the Jets vs Patriots the score is pats 10 jets 0.

http://gonzotrucker.com/uncategorized/cowboys-vs-jets-gonzotrucker-lost-a-bet/

199 total views, no views today

Incoming search terms:

• nfl trucking jobs (2)
• driving jobs for the NFL (1)
• national football league truck drivers (1)
• national football league truck drivers for teams? (1)
• watching football truck stop (1)